Hi there, HR rep...

Congratulations on finding me. It shouldn't have been too difficult, but I've at least tried to make sure it isn't completely tied to me in every publicly identifiable way. But here we are.

So no doubt you're looking here to see if there's anything embarrassing or disqualifying about me that you can use to evaluate my candidacy for your open position. So let's just skip the formalities, and talk honestly for a moment.

You aren't going to find me talking s*** about my boss here, primarily because I started this blog after I left my last job. So, I haven't had a boss since I've had this forum. But also, I'm smart enough not to do that. We'll make a deal. If I need to complain about the boss, I'll do it offline, out loud, to my cats and possibly my spouse. The boy may hear it too, but he's useless to get information out of. I reserve the right to write about it when I turn my wacky work experiences into a book/movie/sitcom on TBS produced by Tyler Perry.

I've already given you the clues about my personal life that you're looking for by a) mentioning a spouse, b) mentioning a child and possibly c) mentioning cats (though if that's really going to come into play in the hiring decision, that's a red flag for me). You also could have just noticed the wedding ring I wore to the interview, and the fact that when you asked what I've been doing while not working, I mentioned spending time with my son. You're clever like that, I know you could pick those clues up.

So what else? My Facebook page is pretty nondescript. From it, you can tell I watch TV, primarily sports, and that I follow politics pretty closely. It's a good bet you can tell which side I'm on in that particular subject area, but I rarely, if ever, bring that stuff up at work.

That's a good place to jump off the specifics and get to a larger point (trust me, I do that a lot here). I'm not the kind of person whose work life and personal life are completely intertwined. Sure, I like socializing with co-workers on occasion, but I'm not going to make the office politics (oh, come on, there are politics in your office, I know what you said in the interview, but there are politics everywhere. It's ok.) into my personal drama. It's just not who I am. Who I am is a reasonably intelligent person who has a life outside of work, and will never do anything stupid to make the company look bad, or be anything but professional. That all having been said, I'm getting impatient with this whole unemployment thing, and would really like to get the job.

Oh, hey, you Googled me, right? You should probably know that I am not a personal injury attorney in South Carolina, and I did not play quarterback for the University of Michigan in 1970 (though that would've been remarkable of me to do so, since I was about a month old when that season started...ooh look, another clue!!!).

(P.S. about the asterisks above, substituting for the bad word...I sometimes forget to do that here, but we're all adults, right?)